How to Ask for a Raise

Learn exactly how to ask for a raise with confidence. This guide covers timing, preparation, scripts, and what to do if you're told no. Evidence-based strategies for salary negotiation.

Her Success Coach helps women leaders build confidence, overcome self-doubt, and lead with clarity. Cambridge-trained, evidence-based coaching for senior women in tech, business, and finance.

Asking for a raise is one of the highest-leverage career conversations you will ever have. Yet most professionals avoid it, delay it, or handle it poorly — not because they lack the skills, but because they lack a strategy. This guide gives you one. It is grounded in negotiation psychology, backed by research, and designed to be used in real conversations with real managers.

Why Most People Never Ask

A PayScale survey of over 160,000 professionals found that only 37% had ever asked for a raise. Of those who did not ask, 28% said they were uncomfortable negotiating salary, and 19% said they did not want to be perceived as pushy. The irony is that 70% of those who did ask received some form of increase.

The research is unambiguous: people who negotiate their salaries earn significantly more over the course of their careers than those who do not. A study by Linda Babcock at Carnegie Mellon found that failing to negotiate a starting salary can cost an individual more than $500,000 by age 60 due to compounding effects.

The cost of not asking is real. The discomfort of asking is temporary.

Step 1: Know Your Market Value

Before you walk into any salary conversation, you need data. Your feelings about what you deserve are not a negotiation strategy. Market data is.

Your goal is to arrive at a specific, defensible number — not a vague "I'd like more." Research by Malia Mason at Columbia Business School shows that precise numbers (e.g., £78,500 rather than £80,000) are perceived as more informed and lead to better outcomes in negotiation.

Step 2: Build Your Case

Your manager does not give you a raise because you want one. They give you a raise because you have demonstrated value that justifies it. Your job is to make that case easy to agree with.

Step 3: Choose Your Timing

Timing is not everything, but it matters more than most people realise. The best time to ask for a raise is when the following conditions align:

The worst time to ask? During your annual review. By then, decisions have usually already been made. Plant the seed 2–3 months before review season.

Step 4: Have the Conversation

This is where preparation meets execution. The conversation itself should be direct, professional, and grounded in evidence.

Opening: Set the Context

Do not ambush your manager. Request a dedicated meeting. Something like: "I'd like to schedule 30 minutes to discuss my compensation and career progression. When works for you this week?"

The Script

Here is a framework you can adapt:

"I want to talk about my compensation. Over the past [time period], I've taken on [specific expanded responsibilities] and delivered [specific results with metrics]. Based on my research into market rates for this role and level, and given the scope of what I'm now doing, I believe an adjustment to [specific number or range] would be appropriate. I'd love to hear your thoughts."

Key principles:

Step 5: Handle the Response

There are three possible outcomes. Be prepared for all of them.

Outcome 1: Yes

Excellent. Confirm the specifics — amount, effective date, whether it will appear in your next pay cycle — and follow up in writing. "Thank you for the conversation today. Just to confirm, we agreed on [amount] effective [date]. I appreciate your support."

Outcome 2: Not Now

This is the most common response and it is not a "no." It is an opening. Your job is to get specifics:

Get the criteria in writing, then execute against them. This turns a deferred "no" into a deferred "yes" with clear conditions.

Outcome 3: No

If the answer is a firm no, stay professional. Ask what factors influenced the decision and whether there are non-salary alternatives: a bonus, equity, additional holiday, professional development budget, flexible working, or a title change.

Then decide what this means for you. A "no" is also data. If the organisation consistently undervalues your contributions, that is important information about whether this is the right place for your career development.

Common Mistakes to Avoid

Beyond Salary: Negotiating the Full Package

Compensation is more than base salary. If there is genuinely no budget for a salary increase, consider negotiating:

Think of compensation as a portfolio, not a single number.

The Long Game: Building a Reputation That Commands Higher Pay

The most effective salary negotiation starts long before the conversation. Professionals who consistently earn above-market compensation share several habits:

You Are Worth Asking

Asking for a raise is not greedy, entitled, or presumptuous. It is a professional conversation about the value of your work. The discomfort you feel before asking is normal — and it is temporary. The financial impact of not asking compounds for years.

Prepare thoroughly. Lead with evidence. Ask directly. And if you want support in building the confidence, strategy, and executive presence to advocate for yourself effectively, executive coaching can provide the structure and accountability to get you there.

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About Her Success Coach

Iveta Dulova is an executive and leadership coach for women with a decade of experience in global technology and a Masters in Coaching and Leadership from the University of Cambridge. She works with women managers, directors, and founders across technology, financial services, and consulting who want to build executive presence, negotiate with confidence, and build a career that reflects their values rather than their fears.

What you will find here

This page is part of the Her Success Coach resource library — a collection of practical articles, frameworks, and coaching programmes designed for women leaders. Explore in-depth guides on leadership confidence, career transitions, executive presence, imposter syndrome, delegation, strategic thinking, and difficult conversations at work. Book a 30-minute Clarity Session to discuss your goals, or join an on-demand course to develop the skills you need at your own pace.